15-Jan-08 9:00 PM  CST  

Open The Box 

Open The Box
Dedicated to All Fathers by John Meador

So one hot August morning, a Saturday yard work day, I was up at 7 am. Knowing it was going to be an all-day affair in the yard, I was ready to go. Also this was the day my son Chris (now “Courageous Coyote”) was going to help me. He went out the night before, promising to help me do yard work on Saturday for the money he needed to go out with on Friday.

The skeptic in side of me (the JUDGE) knew he would try to get out of helping. He had done this in the past, by pissing me off and by my finally saying “Fine, I’ll just finish it myself.” Well, that wasn’t going to happen this time. I was going to make damned sure he would work his ass off for the money I had given him.

So 7 am goes by and then 8 am. Each half hour I am reminding him that he promised to help, and that I am working as we speak. This goes on until about 2:30 pm. By this time, I am very pissed off and I go looking for him. He’s not in his room where he had been all morning. I’m looking and yelling his name. Nothing. I go outside and there he is standing near the pile of dirt he and his friends had made when they were digging for China. (OK they really were digging for China, seriously; it was funny and cute.) So there he is. I’m yelling, “What the hell is going on,” and saying “You promised,” and “You will never get money again unless you work for it first,” and on and on. I’m on a roll.

So he is not saying anything; he looks at me and then looks at something in his hands. I notice he is not arguing with me and walk up to investigate. He has a box. He opens the box and shows me his dead lizard, a pet that his science teacher had given him to take care of and eventually keep for his own.

I am in shock and shame, angry at myself, so I beat myself up. This was a great time to share in his grief.

So on a Saturday morning at a staff meeting on an NTWA weekend I shared this story, and men said, “John, is it time to claim your fatherhood?” I changed my animal name from “Free Lion” to “Father Lion.” So what I learned for me is sometimes before I go off or JUDGE others I should just Open The Box.

I am always enough...

 

Source: John Meador
http://www.mkphouston.org

Related Documents:

Content Tags: drum online • winter 07-08

 

Other Recent Articles:

Return to the The Mankind Project of Houston Articles Search Page